What Is Tantra Massage?
At it’s heart, tantra massage is a conscious, full-body, energy-based healing practice designed to awaken your life force (sexual energy), clear energetic blocks, and reconnect you with your body’s natural capacity for pleasure and presence.
Unlike conventional massage, tantra massage:
works with sexual energy rather than avoiding it
invites emotional expression rather than suppressing it
focuses on breath, sound, movement and intention
honours the genitals as sacred and powerful energetic centres
blends somatic release with nervous system regulation
supports deep relaxation, heightened pleasure, and spiritual connection
A useful tantra massage definition is this:
Tantra massage is the integration of conscious touch, breath, energy body awareness, and sacred eros to release stored tension, awaken pleasure, and return the body to its natural state of aliveness.
I’ve worked with Tantra massage for 10 years! I’ve seen so much arising in sessions, it’s been an incredible journey. In this blog, I try to put into words, how I see it as more than an erotic experience.
The Hidden Story in the Body: Trauma, Tension & Suppressed Energy
All human beings carry emotional experiences in their bodies — especially the ones we never had the safety or support to fully express.
As children, many of us learned that certain emotions were “too much,” or we internalised the core wound, that we were “not enough”, when parts of us were rejected by our parents. If we cried, we were told to stop. If we expressed anger, we were punished. If we had needs, sometimes they were dismissed. Very quickly, we adapted. We learned to hide parts of ourselves to survive.
These suppressed emotions don’t simply disappear — they sink into the body, especially into the muscles, fascia, and pelvic floor. When the body cannot safely process an experience, the energy of that experience becomes stuck. Trauma specialists like Peter Levine and Gabor Maté describe this as incomplete survival responses; energy that never got to finish its natural healing cycle.
This unprocessed energy settles as:
chronic tension
numbness
pain
tightness in the jaw, chest, belly or pelvis
disconnection from pleasure
blocked erotic energy
difficulty relaxing or receiving
In the tantric world, we call these patterns armour; protective contractions that once helped us cope, but now limit our freedom.
Tantra massage offers a pathway to meet and soften this armour gently, consciously, and with deep compassion.
The Lower Chakras: Where the Oldest Wounds Live
Spiritual philosophy teaches that the lower chakras- the Root, Sacral, and Solar Plexus, the heart- hold the densest and earliest emotional material. Each chakra is formed in a 7 year life cycle.
1. Root Chakra (ages 0–7):
Here we store the foundational imprints of safety, acceptance, and belonging. Because this chakra develops in childhood, many painful or overwhelming that happened during these years leaves an energetic memory around the pelvic floor, genitals, anus, and sitting bones.
This is why the pelvis is often called the “subconscious garbage bin.” When no one taught us how to process or express emotions safely, the body did the work for us- storing it away for later. What looks like sexual healing is usually childhood, emotional healing.
2. Sacral Chakra (8-14):
The home of sensuality, desire, creativity, and pleasure. When this area is blocked, we feel shame, guilt and fear around sexuality, disconnected from pleasure, or unable to feel our body fully. Any trauma connected to the womb sits here too.
3. Solar Plexus Chakra (15-21):
Connected to willpower, boundaries, confidence, and emotional digestion. Many people hold tension here as a result of childhood pressure, emotional invalidation, or fear. The inner child often lives here, connected to the ego.
Tantra massage gently opens these energetic gates, allowing the body to finally exhale what it has held for decades.
Central Chakra
4. Heart Chakra (22-28)
Love & loss sit in the heart space. Joy & grief are felt here. As we open the heart in Tantra Massage and connect it with the lower, sexual centre and the higher, spiritual centres, it becomes a bridge in the body. The arms and hands are an extension of the heart, and by massaging the palms, we massage the energetic heart centre too.
The Upper Chakras
5. Throat Chakra (29-35)
In tantra massage, the throat chakra represents truth, expression, and the freedom to be fully heard. Many people carry constriction here from years of silencing their voice or suppressing their needs. Gentle touch, breath, and sound release can soften this area, helping you reclaim your authentic expression. As the throat opens, emotion flows more freely through the body, allowing deeper pleasure and vulnerability to emerge.
6. Third Eye Chakra (36-42)
Working with the third eye invites a state of intuitive awareness, a shift from thinking to perceiving. In tantra massage, this centre helps you connect with your inner guidance, your subtle energy, and the deeper layers of consciousness beneath your physical experience. As this chakra awakens, people often feel waves of insight, expanded awareness, or a sense of seeing their truth more clearly.
7. Crown Chakra (43-49)
The crown chakra opens the channel to something greater; your higher self, universal energy, or the divine. In tantra massage, this is where sexual energy becomes spiritual energy. As pleasure rises and the crown expands, many people experience deep peace, a sense of oneness, or a gentle dissolving of the ego. It is a soft, spacious opening into connection, trust, and transcendence.
How Tantric Bodywork Liberates Stuck Energy
Tantra massage works through a combination of conscious touch, breath, and presence. My approach — rooted in trauma awareness and tantric philosophy — is slow, sensitive, and entirely guided by the receiver’s pace.
During a session, we explore physical and energetic sensations throughout the central energy channel (Sushumna), including:
pelvic floor
genitals
belly
energetic heart
back
throat
jaw
Using soft touch, gentle pressure, breath coaching, and emotional permission, we invite the body to express whatever arises:
tears
shaking
pleasure
memories
sound
deep relaxation
This is the essence of de-armouring:
releasing the contractions that your body once used for protection, so you can experience more expansion, openness, and flow.
You do not need to know the story behind the tension for the release to occur. The body is wise. When it feels safe, it lets go in its own time.
The result is often:
more space inside the body
emotional lightness
deeper breath
ease in the pelvis
increased sensitivity
restored sexual energy
a feeling of coming home
The Importance of Pleasure in Tantra Massage
Western culture has a complicated relationship with pleasure; we crave it and fear it, chase it and judge it. Tantra invites a revolutionary shift:
pleasure is medicine.
Pleasure is not indulgent.
Pleasure is not selfish.
Pleasure is not sinful.
Pleasure is the nervous system’s way of returning to safety, expansion, and vitality.
During tantra massage, pleasure serves two essential purposes:
1. Pleasure Resets the Nervous System
Deep, conscious pleasure shifts the body out of a fight-or-flight state into a restful parasympathetic state. This is where healing becomes possible.
A nervous system bathed in pleasure is more resilient, more receptive, and more capable of integrating emotional release.
2. Pleasure Reconnects You to Your Life Force
Your sexual energy is the most powerful creative energy in your body. When you allow it to flow without shame or pressure, it nourishes your whole system — not just sexually, but emotionally and spiritually.
Tantric bodywork helps you:
stay present with sensation
slow down your arousal
drop goals around orgasm
expand your capacity for pleasure
feel your erotic energy rise through your whole body, not just your genitals
This is where people often discover a new version of themselves — more alive, grounded, open-hearted, empowered, and whole.
Is Tantric Massage Safe?
The answer:
Yes- when practiced by a trained, certified, trauma-informed practitioner.
Safety is foundational to tantra. A true tantra massage is led by:
consent
boundaries
communication
emotional presence
slow pacing
non-goal-oriented touch
The giver holds space — they do not push, perform, or sexualise the experience. They guide the energy while honouring your pace, comfort, and agency at every step.
There are practitioners out there with bad intent. Be careful when choosing who to have a session with- get recommendations first. There have been cases of sexual assault, so always trust your gut and get boundary agreements in writing before, if unsure.
The Benefits of Tantra Massage
Whether you are a man or woman, the benefits of tantra massage are profound and far-reaching:
deeper connection with your body
increased pleasure and orgasmic capacity
release of tension, numbness, or pelvic pain
improved emotional regulation
more confidence and sensuality
awakening of sexual energy
healing from shame, trauma, or conditioning
more presence during sex
deeper intimacy with partners
expanded spiritual awareness
Many people describe tantra massage as:
the therapy they didn’t know they needed
the healing they’ve been craving for years
the turning point in their erotic, emotional, and spiritual life
Tantra Massage as a Path to a New Kind of Reality
In tantra, we consciously create a new way of relating to life, one that isn’t defined by old wounds or unconscious patterns. When the nervous system begins to heal, the story of your life begins to shift too. You eyes are opened to another dimension and there is no going back!
Change your state, and you change your story.
When you have more choice and stop reacting from a limited, outdated subconscious program; you change how you connect to others and how you love.
Tantra massage helps you embody this new reality; not intellectually, but somatically.
Tantra Massage as a Gateway to Aliveness
Tantra massage is not simply about erotic touch; it is about reclaiming yourself. It is about meeting the parts of you that were silenced, ignored, or shamed. It is about discovering that your pleasure is sacred, your body is wise and your sexual energy is a powerful healer. My clients often reported feeling connected to self, others and nature, grounded, embodied, empowered, sensual, open- hearted and alive!
Tantra massage opens the door to a new world in your sexuality. A spiritual, energetic and exciting one.
For Those Wanting to Go Deeper: Courses & Resources
If tantra massage speaks to you, you may feel called to explore further through:
a tantra massage course
a tantra massage book
couples tantric practices
guided sessions and workshops
These resources help you understand how energy works in the body, how to give and receive conscious touch, and how to bring sacred sexuality into your relationships.
